CIATB Chapter 158 Meeting her was the luckiest ordeal of his life, and also his only obsession.
Chapter 158 Meeting her was the luckiest ordeal of his life, and also his only obsession.
The silence of midnight was shattered by a sudden nightmare.
Lu Chenyuan suddenly sat up from the sofa.
Cold sweat soaked through his clothes, sticking to his back and outlining his taut yet vulnerable figure.
Cold sweat trickled down his jawline and landed on his knees, spreading out a small wet patch, like the silent tears in his heart.
The images from my dream still linger in my mind, refusing to leave.
Su Wan stood quietly in front of him, her eyes and brows devoid of their usual vibrancy and charm, replaced only by a cold indifference.
Her voice was as light as the wind, yet sharp enough to pierce his heart.
"Lu Chenyuan, I don't love you anymore. My heart already belongs to someone else."
As soon as she finished speaking, she turned around slowly without any hesitation.
That slender figure walked step by step into the boundless darkness.
As it walked further and further away, it blurred into a tiny dot of light, and eventually disappeared completely.
He chased after her like a madman, calling her name with all his might. His throat was hoarse and aching, and his legs felt as heavy as lead. No matter how fast he ran, he could not catch up with that resolute figure.
We could only watch helplessly as she disappeared...
That feeling of utter despair, like a cold tide, completely overwhelmed him.
After a long while, he finally calmed his rapid breathing. He felt weak and sore all over, his head was very dizzy, his cheeks were burning hot, and even his breath was hot.
He fumbled for the thermometer on the coffee table, his fingertips trembling as he tucked it under his arm. A few minutes later, he took it out. The number 39 degrees Celsius stung his eyes in the dim light, and also pierced the desolation in his heart.
How long has it been since he had a high fever? Roughly two years.
He had long been accustomed to weathering all storms, accustomed to hiding his vulnerability and wretchedness in corners where no one could see him, thinking he had already developed an impenetrable fortress. But he never expected that the anxiety, struggle, longing, and fear of these days would eventually overwhelm him.
Perhaps his older brother's affairs had thrown his mind into turmoil.
Perhaps he was too afraid of losing Su Wan, afraid that she would turn around and throw herself into someone else's arms, afraid that she would eventually smile and tell him that they were not suitable.
At this moment, he was acutely aware that Su Wan was an obsession ingrained in his very being, the only light in his bleak life.
He cannot live without her; even losing her for a second would be enough to ruin him forever.
These past few days, he's always been so domineering and forceful in front of her, with an unyielding obsession, as if he has everything under control.
But only he knew that his strength was nothing more than a disguise to conceal his vulnerability.
He was afraid he wasn't good enough, afraid he couldn't give her the tenderness she wanted, afraid she would eventually tire of his violence, tire of his possessiveness, and then completely leave him, leaving him alone, guarding endless memories, and growing old in solitude.
He dared not think too deeply about what he would do if Su Wan really gave him a rejection tomorrow or the day after.
Perhaps he really will lose control and use the clumsiest and most obsessive methods to bind her to his side.
Even if she hates him, even if she's never happy in her life.
Even if a forced relationship is bitter, he's willing to endure it for a lifetime, as long as she's by his side.
After waking up from the nightmare, I never felt sleepy again.
Lu Chenyuan slowly got up, walked unsteadily to the balcony, and pushed open the sliding door.
The cool night breeze, carrying a slightly damp chill, swept over him, making him shiver, but it couldn't dispel the restlessness and desolation in his heart.
He leaned against the cold railing, his figure tall yet lonely, like a forgotten statue, his gaze vacant as he stared at the night view outside the window.
The night was thick and dark, without starlight or moonlight, only the neon lights of the distant city emitting a faint and ambiguous halo, which shone through the thin mist onto the empty streets, casting scattered light and shadows, but could not penetrate the darkness and loneliness in his heart.
He suddenly had a delusional thought: if there hadn't been that encounter at the alleyway, if they had never crossed paths, would he not have been tormented by this anxiety, would he not have been filled with such heart-wrenching fear, would he not have been so tormented by this love, leaving him battered and bruised?
But then he thought, if time could turn back, he would still be willing to let God send Su Wan to his side again.
Even if this love is full of struggle and pain, even if he has to endure endless longing and unease, even if in the end only regret remains, he will never regret meeting her.
Meeting her was the luckiest ordeal of his life, and also his only obsession.
While Lu Chenyuan was alone on the balcony, swallowing his loneliness and sadness, Su Wan also couldn't fall asleep.
After she got home, she didn't go inside immediately. Instead, she quietly hid in a corner of the balcony and, with the curtains obscuring her view, gazed silently downstairs.
She saw Lu Chenyuan leaning against the car, a cigarette between his fingers, his figure appearing particularly lonely and desolate amidst the swirling smoke.
His gaze was fixed on her window, and the longing and reluctance in his eyes, like fine rain, fell into her heart, stirring up a bittersweet ripple.
Only when Xiao Li drove up did he reluctantly turn around and get into his car.
The car slowly drove away and disappeared into the thick night, leaving no trace.
Only after that familiar car had completely disappeared into the distance did Su Wan slowly withdraw her gaze, her eyes filled with an overwhelming sadness and confusion.
My nose tingled slightly, and my heart felt like it was blocked by something, making me feel suffocated and even breathing felt like a dull ache.
She turned and went into the bathroom, trying to wash away the chaos and turmoil in her heart with the warm water.
But when she lay in bed and closed her eyes, she realized that the sleepless night was still long.
Her mind was like a silent movie playing, replaying every moment since she met Lu Chenyuan.
Every scene is so clear, it's as if it happened just yesterday.
Every memory, tinged with both sweetness and bitterness, lingers in her heart.
She recalled their first meeting, by the barbecue stall at the alley entrance, under the dim light, when she immediately spotted the tall, aloof man.
At that moment, my heart raced uncontrollably; I fell in love at first sight.
Knowing that Lin Man was by his side, knowing that she was like a moth drawn to a flame, she still couldn't help but pester him and take the initiative to get closer to him regardless of everything. Even though he treated her coldly time and time again, even though she was rejected by him time and time again, even though she suffered all kinds of grievances, she never thought of giving up.
Later, when he pushed her away, her heart shattered completely. All her pride and stubbornness collapsed at that moment.
She finally learned to give up, to withdraw, and to deliberately avoid all traces of him.
During the two weeks of no contact, she thought she could let go completely and that time could heal all the pain.
But only she knew that in the dead of night, his image was still the one that appeared in her mind.
The longing in my heart has never ceased.
Then, his sudden confession and sudden love, like a blazing flame, instantly burned her entire world.
His domineering nature, his obsession, his gentleness, and his doting affection gradually melted the ice in her heart, making her fall in love with him again.
But deep down, a subtle hesitation still lingered.
She didn't know what she was hesitating about. Was she afraid of being hurt again? Was she afraid that his obsession and possessiveness would suffocate her again? Or was she afraid that this sudden change would ultimately be just a dazzling firework, fleeting and ephemeral?